Feel Bad After Gambling
- Gambling addiction is a debilitating condition, causing depression and distress. For someone with a gambling addiction, the feeling of gambling is equivalent to taking a drug or having a drink.
- Don't Feel Bad If you come off a slot machine and someone wins the jackpot straight after you. Don't feel bad, because you probably would not have won it anyway.
Addiction to gambling, coupled with substance abuse can make the gamblers physically abusive towards their family. The stress of risking huge amounts of money or the frustration after losing it can increase the tendency of abuse in gamblers. Due to lost mental peace, they may ill-treat their spouse and children. “Because of the involvement of a family member, our hearts have been drawn to the Christian Recovery of Compulsive Gambling and Gambling Addiction. After doing considerable research on the internet on compulsive gambling and participating in the Recovery Process (Gambler’s Anonymous) with a loved one in a Support Group (Gamanon), we would.
Medically reviewed:06/22/2018
Last updated: 04/17/2020
Author: Addictions.com Medical Review
Reading Time: 7minutes
What is Gambling Addiction?
Gambling addiction or gambling disorder is defined as persistent and recurring problematic gambling behavior that causes distress and impairs your overall livelihood. Gambling addiction affects roughly 0.2% to 0.3% of the general U.S. population, and tends to affects males more than females, though this gender gap has narrowed in recent years. Gambling disorder is a behavioral addiction that can be effectively treated using a range of cognitive and behavioral therapies.
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The desire to buy scratch tickets, play slot machines, and visit casinos aren’t necessarily signs of gambling addiction. But when the desire to gamble becomes overwhelming to the point you can’t stop thinking about it until you gamble on something, may be a sign you need help. Those who suffer from gambling addiction will continue to gamble despite negative financial, legal, and social consequences.
Gambling disorder is a brain disease that can cause you to do things you wouldn’t normally do if you weren’t suffering from addiction. Behavioral addictions like gambling disorder are often difficult to manage and control without getting professional help. Addiction treatment centers can help you overcome gambling addiction and teach you important skills aimed at helping you repair problems in your life caused by your disorder.
What are the Signs and Symptoms of Gambling Addiction?
There are no physical health symptoms associated with gambling disorder. Familiarizing yourself with common gambling addiction behaviors can clue you into whether you or a loved one may need professional help.
Chasing after losses is the most common tell-tale sign of gambling disorder. This particular symptom is marked by the urgent need to continue gambling to earn back a loss or series of losses. Individuals diagnosed with gambling disorder may abandon their usual gambling strategies to win back all losses at once and may lie to family, friends, and therapists to hide the severity of their addiction.
The following behaviors are potential signs of gambling addiction:
- Needing to gamble using increasing amounts of money to achieve the desired rush and excitement.
- Feeling restless or irritable when trying to reduce or stop gambling.
- Inability to control, reduce, or quit gambling despite numerous repeated attempts.
- Preoccupation with gambling, such as devising ways to get more gambling money and reliving past gambling experiences.
- Gambling when experiencing feelings of distress, helplessness, guilt, anxiety, and depression.
- Chasing after your losses to get even after losing money gambling.
- Lying to conceal the severity of gambling behaviors, and the addiction.
- Loss of personal relationships, job, and educational pursuits due to gambling.
- Replying on others to provide money to resolve financial situations caused by gambling, such as a threat of eviction from the home.
Those with a mild gambling addiction may exhibit between four and five of these behaviors, while those with a moderately severe gambling addiction may exhibit six to seven of these behaviors. People who suffer from severe gambling addiction will usually exhibit all nine behaviors. Moderate to severe cases of gambling disorder tend to be more common than mild cases.
You might have a gambling problem if:
- You feel compelled to keep gambling until you’ve spent your last dollar. You may keep bidding until you’ve spent everything to win your money back, or you continue increasing bet amounts.
- You hide your gambling from friends or family members. You may sneak off to gamble without telling anyone, or lie about your gambling activities.
- You spend money you don’t have on gambling. You may use money intended for important bills like rent, mortgage, car payments, credit card bills, and other expenses for gambling.
- You steal from others or sell your possessions so you can gamble. You may steal money or belongings from others so you can gamble, or sell or pawn valuable possessions like musical instruments and vehicles to obtain more gambling money.
- You prioritize gambling over obligations related to work, school, family. You may stop going to work or school so you can gamble, or stop buying household necessities so you can use the money for gambling instead.
- You’re experiencing financial hardships due to gambling. You may have lost your home, car, job, and important personal possessions due to gambling.
- You’re facing a range of negative emotions triggered by gambling. Gambling may be a serious problem in your life if it’s triggering depression, anxiety, frustration, agitation, and remorse.
- You want to stop gambling but can’t. You have tried to stop gambling but can’t seem to stop despite your desire to do better and to stop gambling.
Negative Effects of Gambling Addiction
Gambling addiction can produce many more negative effects than just financial hardship. Gambling disorder can affect your physical health, mental health, and social functioning, and lead to the loss of important relationships with friends and loved ones. You may also suffer a decline in work or school performance, and feel more restless and bored with all other areas of life that don’t involve gambling.
Those who suffer from gambling addiction tend to suffer from higher rates of poor general health than those who don’t gamble. Tachycardia and angina are common health problems among those diagnosed with gambling addiction. Many who suffer from gambling disorder also tend to experience distortions in thinking surrounding their addiction, such as superstitions, overconfidence, and a sense of power over the outcome of chance events. Nearly 50% of those receiving treatment for gambling disorder experience suicidal ideation, while an estimated 17% have tried to commit suicide.
The negative effects of problem gambling include:
- Financial problems including high debt, poverty, or bankruptcy
- Domestic violence and child abuse in families
- Suicidal thoughts, attempts, or the act of suicide
- Legal troubles, including arrests for theft or prostitution
- Behavior problems in children of problem gamblers
- Depression, anxiety, and other mental health disorders
- Loss of relationships with friends and family
- A decline in performance at work or school
- Suicide and death
- A risk for drug or alcohol abuse
How Does Gambling Addiction Interact with Addiction?
Alcohol and cocaine are the two most common substances associated with gambling and binge gambling, respectively. Alcohol is legally available in most gambling settings such as bars and casinos and is often rewarded to gamblers for free at many of these establishments. Roughly 44% of people with gambling disorder in the U.S. also suffer from an alcohol use disorder.
Binge gambling is defined as intermittent episodes of uncontrolled gambling after long periods of abstinence. For instance, a person who practices binge gambling may only visit the casino five times per year but gamble non-stop for long periods during their stay. Cocaine use tends to be common among these gamblers since it produces stimulating effects of increased energy, alertness, focus, concentration, and confidence.
Individuals with gambling disorders tend to suffer higher rates of co-occurring alcohol and drug use disorders compared to their peers. Gambling often takes place in environments that enable and encourage alcohol and drug use. Gambling can also trigger mental health conditions like anxiety and depression, which many may self-treat using alcohol and drugs like marijuana, painkillers, and other addictive substances.
How Are Gambling Addiction and Substance Use Treated?
Gambling addiction is commonly treated using cognitive and behavioral therapies that treat the root psychological causes of your addiction. These therapies also help you identify and change negative, unhealthy thoughts and behaviors that may have led to your gambling addiction. Treatments for gambling addiction can be tailored especially for you or your loved one based on the factors surrounding your disorder.
Gambling addiction can also be treated using community reinforcement, group therapy, and 12-step support groups like Gamblers Anonymous. These treatments help you identify your triggers that can lead to gambling and teach you ways to overcome and manage those triggers. For instance, if a stressful day at work usually makes you feel like gambling, you may learn yoga, deep breathing, or other healthy methods that relieve stress without putting your health and well-being at risk.
Gambling Addiction Help
If you or someone you love needs treatment for gambling addiction, it’s important that you use a treatment approach that best suits your recovery needs. Gambling addiction treatment is available in many different settings, including inpatient and outpatient treatment settings.
Inpatient gambling addiction treatment can greatly benefit those who suffer from severe gambling disorder, and who have suffered severe financial, legal, or social problems. Inpatient treatment includes around-the-clock supervision in a hospital-like setting where you can live for the duration of your treatment program. The intense level of therapy, counseling, and supervision provided by inpatient treatment centers can help significantly reduce the risk of relapse while in recovery.
Compulsive gamblers often need support from friends, family members, and peers to help them stop gambling. Gamblers Anonymous groups can provide peer and social support for those in recovery or for those who wish they can stop gambling. These groups can provide a solid, healthy foundation for a successful and long-term recovery from gambling addiction.
Here’s how to help a family member or loved one suffering from a gambling addiction:
- Understand the addiction. The first thing you can do to help a loved one who is addicted to gambling is to learn all you can about the addiction. Find a support group that can help you cope with the stress that comes from having a loved one who is addicted to gambling.
- Find support. Support for yourself and for your loved one who is addicted can be very beneficial in helping with a gambling addiction. Many support groups are available throughout communities and in treatment centers. Therapists and counselors can also provide support for gambling addiction.
- Manage money tightly. If your loved one is addicted to gambling and is actively pursuing help, take over managing all financial responsibilities for your loved one. This can help reduce any gambling impulses your loved one may be experiencing throughout their recovery.
What do you do if you are married to someone who is caught up into gambling? He or she might even be going down the downhill slope of gambling away your marriage, family relationship, your home and everything you own and treasure.
What if YOU are the gambler who is caught up in this type of behavior?
These are issues we’d like to address in this article that we pray can help you in some way.
When Gambling is Destroying Marriages
We know this is a tall order and that we can only scratch the surface of the subject. But because of the seriousness of this problem, we know it’s important to do what we can to help those who are overwhelmed by it all.
We don’t want to approach this subject as if we are the experts here at Marriage Missions advising you. That is because frankly, we have very little experience in this area of marriage. We do, however, personally know of several couples that have/are dealing with this issue. But that is more of a distant view, rather than an up close and personal one. So we will facilitate within this article, the opportunity for others who are more experienced to share what they have learned.
First:
Lets look at gambling in general to give you information you might find helpful. We’d then like to address the person who is married to the gambler (and other family members and friends). And then we’ll address the gambler, as well.
One of the “truths” concerning gambling that we didn’t know was brought up in an article titled, “Gambling’s Impact on Families.” It is put together by Ronald A. Reno. He wrote:
“A University of Nebraska Medical Center study concluded that problem gambling is as much a risk factor for domestic violence as alcohol abuse. Domestic violence murders in at least 11 states have been traced to gambling problems since 1996.”
Another article written by Ronald Reno (and posted on the Beliefnet.com web site) brings out the scriptural reasons why gambling isn’t something we should indulge in. He brings out the point:
“Jesus commanded, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself‘(Mark 12:31). Gambling, meanwhile, is predicated on the losses, pain, and suffering of others. For one to win at gambling, others must lose. For many, the ramifications attributable to their gambling losses are profound. Families touched by a gambling addiction are at greatly increased risk for such negative outcomes as divorce, bankruptcy, child abuse, domestic violence, crime, and suicide.”
Feel Bad After Gambling Advice
Besides that point, the article brings out others as well, with scriptures to support them. To find out more, please click onto the link below to read:
• GOD AND GAMBLING
What Can You Do?
After you recognize that there is a gambling problem going on within your family and that gambling can grow in its negative impact, what can the family do about it? Marriageuncensored.com had an interesting article posted on their web site that brings out the important point:
“There’s the failure of the non-addicted spouse and other family members to respond appropriately and helpfully to the situation. Now, don’t get me wrong on this. I understand that the person with the addiction is the one who must ultimately take responsibility and make the changes to get healthy. If you are the supportive spouse, I am not suggesting that you are responsible for the addiction or the havoc it’s wreaking in your home.
“I am suggesting, however, that the way in which you respond can either create an environment that will help your spouse beat their addiction, or it can contribute to and compound the problem. As the partner who is one step removed from the addiction, you will have a huge impact on how this will turn out —for better or worse.
“The tendency of many in this situation is to tiptoe around the addict and their habit. But while letting sleeping dogs lie may get you through the day, it will not bring about the results you desire long-term.”
Gamblers and the Denial Factor
In a web site article, “Tiptoeing Around Addictions” Dr. Dave Currie, with Glen Hoos, made the point that “DENIAL” is one of the “unhealthy ways that “people respond to their spouse’s addiction.” They make the point that the addict tries to deny that there is a problem. But:
“Their spouse, family and friends often get hooked into it as well. The spouse in particular may deny the extent of the problem. They may try to convince themselves that their marriage is strong enough to bear up under this pressure, and that the issue is better left alone.
“You’ve got to be willing to let go of the security of that fantasy, and face reality. The first (and often hardest) step is admitting you have a problem. The issue is there whether you admit it or not; accepting the truth puts you on the road to recovery. If you deny the depth of the problem, your spouse will have no compelling reason to face it either. If this is the case your situation is never going to improve.”
Enablement Concerning Gamblers
And then there is, “ENABLEMENT,” which is “denial taken a step further.” As Dave Currie and Glen Hoos write:
“It’s covering for the addict, protecting them from the natural consequences of their actions. Some examples:
• “The boss calls and asks the woman why her husband isn’t at work today. ‘He’s in bed, sick,’ she answers… neglecting to mention that the sickness is due to a killer hangover incurred the night before.
• “The wife’s gambling addiction has strained the family finances to the point where the bills can no longer be paid. Instead of facing the real issue, the husband arranges to skip a mortgage payment and opens yet another line of credit.”
Facing the Truth
It’s tempting to do this because it seems easier to do this than to face the truth. However, as it’s pointed out:
“What you’re doing when you cover for the person is removing their motivation to change. Maybe he needs to get fired to wake him up. Maybe she needs to go to the store and have her credit card rejected when she’s trying to buy groceries to realize there’s a problem here.”
“Instead of enabling, you’ve got to intervene. Whether that’s a one-on-one confrontation or some kind of a group intervention depends on what you’re facing. But you need to come to the point where you sit down and say, ‘Okay, we have a problem here. What are we going to do about it?'”
Abandonment
Another way that a spouse and family may tiptoe around addiction is that they turn to “ABANDONMENT” as a way to cope.
“They cover for the addict one too many times and have come to the point where they say, ‘You know what? You got yourself into this mess… now get yourself out of it!’ They wash their hands of the situation and leave their spouse to deal with the problem alone.
“It’s understandable that some people get to this point. After all, it’s their spouse who chose this road, and paying for their bad behavior gets old very fast. Nevertheless, if you’re in this position you’ve got to ask yourself how you want this to play out? Do you really want your spouse to get cleaned up and get your marriage back on track? Because if that’s what you want, you’re not going to get it by leaving your husband or wife to fend for themselves. They’re going to need your support and encouragement every step of the way.
Suppress the Urge to Blame
“Somehow, you’ve got to suppress the urge to cast blame and point fingers. Instead of putting the problem between you, you’ve got to stand side-to-side with the problem in front of you and say, ‘We have a problem. It happens to be your addiction, but it’s our problem, and we’re going to solve it together.’ What a world of difference from the, ‘It’s your problem… deal with it!’ approach.
“This is undeniably tough, especially if your spouse is not showing a willingness to do the hard work of recovery. However, don’t mistake support for softness. Supporting your spouse may mean confronting them, refusing to cover for them, and perhaps even separating for a period of time while they work through it. But it’s got to be done in a context of love and encouragement, and an attitude that says, ‘We will do whatever it takes to get you healthy and to put our marriage back on solid ground.'”
Now, it’s true that you may have been there and done that. But it’s important not to keep allowing this addiction to keep going on in your home. That is because it will continue to erode your marital relationship until eventually your marriage will be totally destroyed. There is no doubt that help is needed —desperately!
Flying Solo
“FLYING SOLO” is another temptation facing you in all of this. Dave and Glen write further:
“As in many other areas of life, pride can be crippling when it comes to dealing with addiction. Pride causes you to say, ‘We don’t need help. We can handle this on our own.’
“Most addicts require outside help to fully conquer their habits —and fortunately, help is widely available. Whether it’s Gamblers Anonymous, Alcoholics Anonymous, Sex Addicts Anonymous —name the addiction, and there is likely a group to help people through it. And if there aren’t any groups for it, there are counselors, pastors, friends to walk alongside you. And there are helpful resources available that can really make a difference.
“You’d be wise if you reached out for help at this time, and not just for the one with the addiction. There are also support groups for spouses, friends and family of addicts. Talking with others that are on a similar journey can bring you strength in difficult times.”
Addiction Info
So, in our search for help for those who are being impacted by the negative effects of gambling upon their lives, we found the following to be something that you may want to use. The authors wrote:
“Because of the involvement of a family member, our hearts have been drawn to the Christian Recovery of Compulsive Gambling and Gambling Addiction. After doing considerable research on the internet on compulsive gambling and participating in the Recovery Process (Gambler’s Anonymous) with a loved one in a Support Group (Gamanon), we would like to share what we have found with all who visit this web site.”
To take advantage of what they offer, whether you are a family member, friend or someone who is dealing with your own gambling issues, please click onto the following web site link:
• IS GAMBLING A PROBLEM? Gambling Addiction Information
Something that would be good for the gambler to consider is written by Gregory L. Jantz. Please read:
• 14 QUESTIONS EVERY GAMBLER SHOULD ASK
Older Gamblers
And if you think that it’s only those who are younger that are having problems in this area of life, think again. The ministry of Focus on the Family put together a great series of articles. They are aimed to help those who are living out the years of “Midlife and Beyond.” They are betting their life savings away hoping to obtain more to live on in their growing years. To read the first of the series and then continue on to the other articles they offer on this subject, please read:
Feel Bad After Gambling Winnings
• GAMBLING AND SENIORS
We hope you have found this article to be helpful. We encourage you to “Join the Discussion” below if you have further help for those who need it.
Cindy Wright of Marriage Missions International wrote this article.